Rooster Rage

I'm getting ready to go to africa for the fall, and one of the things I'm most looking forward to (besides the profound life lessons, of course) is the randomness of life in a third-world country. It's just not quite the same as your average day in america. 

Thinking about this trip has reminded me of my time on the island of Tobago many moons ago. My friend Gretchen and I spent the summer there during college, helping with children's programs at a local church. It was a tough job, but someone had to suffer for Jesus in the islands. 

We had a lot of spare time, because the island runs on Tobago Time, which means anything planned is very, very relative. For some reason, we made up a lot of songs in our downtime. During VBS, we taught 100+ children "We Will Rock You" rewritten into a rowdy worship song. It was a huge hit, let me tell you. 

Among the highlights of the summer: having a friend named Amigo, homemade ice cream, pristine beaches everywhere, and wonderful, hilarious, loving people.  

Among the lowlights: constant heckling and cat calls by the local riff-raff, mushy root vegetables at every meal, and lastly, our arch-nemisis: the rooster. 

Having grown up on a farm, I did not think these lovely little animals would be a problem. Well, I couldn't have been more mistaken. Every nice farm story about the rooster crowing at sunrise is wrong. These boys crowed at sunrise. and at midnight. and at one am, two am, etc....all. night. long. 

Needless to say, this did not sit well with us, and Gretchen and I did what any normal, sleep-deprived people would do in this scenario: we created another song to express our distress and help us cope with our anger. 

I give you (not previously released).....

                                        "Rooster Rage" 

I waddle up to that stupid thing 

and say "Hey You- Mr. Ding-a-ling

If you don't stop that stupid cocking 

I'll turn you into my Christmas stocking." 

stuffed, stuffed, stuffed little rooster.    

chorus: (sung to the tune of "Bad Boys") 

"rooster rage, rooster rage 

whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do 

when they cock-a-doodle do?" 

repeat chorus until the angst has drained from your body and you can rest again. 

Feel free to borrow it if you need. Shockingly, we have not copyrighted it just yet.